Why do I eat sweets?

Why do I eat sweets?

I know they're bad for me.

They make me feel fat and grumpy.

They make my pants tight, which also makes me feel fat and grumpy.

Sometimes, they even gives me a headache.

What is it about sweets?

As I pressed my fork down through the smooth texture of my famous pumpkin cheesecake, I thought about not eating sweets.

I raised my fork to my mouth . . . the velvety texture on my tongue . . . simply divine.

Comfort food. Pure comfort.

It is doing something that you know you shouldn't do.

It is a privilege.

Something out of the ordinary in the midst of ordinary life.

It speaks of family and friends and laughter, it smells and tastes of love and happiness.

It's a cup of hot chocolate on a cold winter night, a pan of fresh, warm Cinnamon rolls on a Sunday, a bowl of ice cream on a summer's day, strawberry short cake of the fourth of July, apple pie when the leaves start to turn, chocolate cake on your birthday,and on this day, pumpkin cheesecake to bring in the New Year.

I fear it's in my blood . . .

and on my thighs!

Confession . . .

I ditched church in the middle of Sunday school. Just grabbed the baby and ran for the door. Now it's just me at home + baby's sleeping = heaven! Sunday mornings are hard! I love church but I have the hardest time with the "getting to" part. I am always late. It doesn't even matter what time I get up, I'm late. Some days I get upset about it and others I shrug it off. Today I am feeling a little overwhelmed. How can one person do all of this? I now have a family of six and I am the Mommy! I am the one that is supposed to hold all of this mess together! My hat is off to you women of all ages who have managed to figure out a way. I guess that is where I am at, figuring out a way. We've got the love part down. There is a lot of love to go around. It is all of the managing. Managing emotions, clothing, meals, paperwork, groceries, events, homework, and extra curriculars. I'm off to try to "organize" myself on paper . . . wish me luck!

Weekly Chores

Monday:
-Empty Trash (Every trash can in the house!)
-Wash and change Sheets
(half of the beds each week)
-Clean Mirrors
(mirrors on landing, in piano room, dressers, bathrooms, French doors, and front door)
-Swiffer Floors Swiffer around the kitchen table and snack bar
(all hard surfaces including bathrooms)
-Get caught up with Laundry Run two or three loads and then give up
(Folded and put away in drawers)
-Throw out old magazines and mail Look at the stack in the corner and let out a deep sigh
(Any paper clutter that we don’t need)
-Clean out refrigerator How long has this been in here? Didn't we have this last week. (Green mold and fuzz means longer than a week)
(Throw out old food and wipe down)

Tuesday:
Empty Trash
Change Sheets
Clean Mirrors
Swiffer Floors
Vacuum Stairs and Upstairs
-Plan Menu Waste time looking up new recipes and flipping through cook books and then decide to make the old standards because you don't have the energy to make a grocery list of all of the new items you will need.
-Grocery Shop I'll wait until my husband gets home.
-Mop Floors Spot treat spaghetti stains . . . Why do I even put this on here??
(on the main floor and the bathrooms)
-Water Plants Have I ever done this??

Wednesday:
Empty Trash
Change Sheets
Clean Mirrors
Swiffer Floors
Vacuum Stairs and Upstairs
-file papers In the trash can
(bills, kids art, etc.)
-Run errands
(make returns)
-Outings with Kids
-Arrange a babysitter for Friday. Wish we could go out this weekend!

Thursday:
Empty Trash
Change Sheets
Clean Mirrors
Swiffer Floors
Vacuum Stairs and Upstairs
-Zone Cleaning
(focus on a specific area)
-Clean Bathrooms Clear the area, wipe down with a clorox wipe and call it good
(Toilets, tubs and sinks)
-Wash bathroom and kitchen rugs They're still in the laundry room from last week.



Friday:
Give up on Monday's Chores and decide to do them next Monday.
-Clean out purse Say What?
-Dust Say What?
-clean laundry room I can barely open the door!
(wipe down washer and dryer, clean out shoe basket, take items that are hanging to their appropriate destinations)
-Go on a date! Watch reruns of Sienfeld and go to bed.

Saturday:
- Clean out and wash the car. Have you seen my car?
(includes vacuuming, washing windows and wiping out interior)
- Play with Family!
- Saturday Chores Scatter toys all over the house!
(preparing for the Sabbath: straightening up, setting out clothing for church, empty dishwasher)
- Prepare for Sunday Dinner Finally go to the grocery store!
(plan what we are having and take things out of the freezer, make certain dishes in advance)

Sunday:
-Write in Journal Try to take a nap!
-Play games and spend family time.



Does anyone know a good housekeeper?

Energy

Energy is a curious thing. It seems like I am always trying to figure out how to have more energy. My latest unexpected discovery is this; I am way off when it comes to what I think will give me more energy.
Normally, I figure that I need to give myself more "down time" so that I can recharge my battery, then, I will have more energy. Down time usually consists of, TV time, couch time, Computer time, etc. Recently, I have discovered that going for a walk with the kids or kicking the ball around gives me more energy than couch time. My best excuse for not doing those things has always been, "I just don't have the energy, I am too tired." I never realized that running around and playing with the kids would actually give me more energy than it required. Who knew?
The other thing that I typically think after a long and somewhat sleepless night is that I should sleep in. "Sleeping in" for a Mom is merely just lying in bed for an extra thirty minutes to an hour and then rushing around trying to get everything done that you need to get done before you get your kids out the door. Make breakfast, pack lunches, argue about which outfits they can wear and how white tennis shoes don't look good with church dresses, brush teeth, do hair, lecture about the crying and complaining while doing hair, finding matching socks, finding shoes, tying shoes, filling water bottle and backpacks and coaxing children out the door only to miss the bus and end up driving them to the school.

At least that is how it usually goes for me.

So . . . I have decided that sleeping in is overrated. Do you know what is really worth it. Getting up! It gives me so much more energy than sleeping in. Who knew?

Again, who knew?

The problem with my discoveries is that I usually end up rediscovering them many times over. How to make it stick?? That is the real problem.

Venting or complaining - take your pick

I am grumpy. I am not entirely sure why. It is kind of ironic since my last post talked about how happiness is a choice. So, I guess, I choose to be grumpy today. I think I am tired which always seems to make it worse. I also had a TON of sugar last night at Enrichment which probably has something to do with it. (The crash after the sugar high) I feel like there are a thousand things that I am trying to do that are essential. I need to be organized, not just so that my house will sparkle but just so that we can find the things we need in every day life. I need to read to my kids more. Audrey is falling behind her class and Rachel does not know all of her letter sounds and some of the kids in her class are already reading! I feel overwhelmed and guilty that I have not done better for my girls. How are they ever going to succeed if I can't get my act together and make sure that they are where they need to be in school. I just feel like EVERYTHING takes so much time and EVERYTHING is important. I feel guilty that they have been eating complete junk for dinner that last few nights as I have planned Enrichment Meeting. They need healthy food so that they can have healthy bodies. I totally believe that! I also see other Mom's that have their children "dressed to the nines" and my kids clothes are getting faded and thread bare. They are so darn cute and I feel that they deserve better. On the other hand, I think it is good for them not to have everything and to learn what is really important and what is not.
I am also feeling like a boring Mom. Rachel said to me the other day, "Mom! I have been seeing lots of Halloween decorations at other people's houses! We need to put our decorations up!" What decorations? That is just not something I have spent any money on. I don't want my kids to miss out on Holidays because I was too cheap to pick up a couple of ghosts and scarecrows at the dollar store.
Then for my greatest concern . . . health. I am so afraid of Rachel getting sick again. She has been complaining about her stomach hurting and then this morning she said that her foot was hurting. It could be a stomach bug and her shoe could have rubbed her wrong yesterday and made it sensitive (she is missing a lot of cushion around that area). I just hate that my gut always wants to think the worst. I am also frustrated that with all of the habits that I want to have as part of my character are fleeting at best. AARG! Anyway, I will keep on trying! Until next time . . .

A Creative House is a Messy House

I may be wrong about this one. So far, it is VERY true for me. I haven't figured out a way to get everything done on my list and everything clean in the house and then sit down and "be" creative. Every time I am "creative" the house goes to pot! I have been working on Invitations for Enrichment Night at church, throwing the kids an impromptu party for the long weekend, and writing this blog. Oddly enough, (as my Dad always says) the laundry is scattered, the dishes are piled high, and there is "stuff" everywhere! Oh well. We could be clean and BORING!

"Happiness is a State of Mind"

I have heard this idea and concept before. It sounded nice. However, it wasn't true for me. Happiness was the result of things going well in my life. I was happy when I was getting along with my husband, when I was at my "perfect" weight, when I had cute clothes to wear, when I liked my haircut, when I had good friends, when I had something "fun" to do, when my house was clean, and when my kids were well behaved. (To name a few) Surprisingly, I wasn't "happy" very often. In my ignorance, I believed that outside influences had something to do with the whole thing! What a giant misconception!
My husband used to tell me, "nobody can 'make' you happy" or "nobody can 'make' you mad!" (This argument usually used in his own defense) "Phewey!" I used to think. You are making me mad right now!! How truly wrong I was.
As life has happened to me over the last few years, I have discovered that the old adage has some clout! You mean I have some control over this? Fascinating! As it turns out, happiness is a choice that I get to make every day. I have found that the strongest tool to have in my toolbox is gratitude. When I become grateful for my life, I am free to be happy.
The next enlightening realization for me was that I had to stop "expecting" my life to turn out a certain way. A wise friend of mine always says, "all frustration stems from unmet expectations." I should expect to have trials, and expect for things not to go as planned. That is life. Now that I know that, I can choose to BE happy because I AM a happy person, not because my life is exactly what I want it to be.
I am going to choose to be happy. I hope you will too!


*I have been interrupted four times since writing this and Rachel and Adam have been given chocolate milk and goldfish crackers for breakfast to keep them quiet.

Becoming Mom

I have decided to change the whole focus and idea of this blog. Originally, the idea was that I would start this blog with all of my "Mom" friends and we could all contribute ideas and experiences. Since that concept has not evolved, I have changed course. I told James the other day that I had decided to keep writing this blog for the sake of my own children. Someday, I would like to give them a book of this blog's contents. I would love to know of the processes that my own Mother went through as she "became Mom." I always picture her as she is now, with all of her wonderful characteristics and habits in tact. Someday I would like my children to look at me that way. However, I would like for them to read about the times when I fell short! I want them to know how difficult it was for me to develop the habits and character traits that I hope to possess in the distant future. I hope that they can learn from my mistakes and hopefully from some of the things I do right as well: a guide book to Motherhood if you will. So, if you continue to read, this is about to get a little more personal. I am comfortable with that.

Music

My Dad has taught me that music sets the tone in your home! All of my childhood memories are rooted in this idea. If you lived at my house growing up, this is what you could expect:

Fourth of July - Patriotic band music blasting throughout all rooms of the house at 6:00 a.m. to get us excited to go to the parade.
Christmas - All different kinds of Christmas music from spiritual to sacrilege!
Birthday - The Beetles "They say it's your Birthday" wake up call
A weekday Morning - "The Hills are alive with the Sound of Music" compliments of my Dad sung over the intercom!
Sunday Morning - Hymns or Classical Music
Playing cards or games as a Family - Soul music
Road Trips - You name it . . . this is when we were helplessly subjected to all kinds of music whether we liked it or not!
Around the Campfire - Silly songs that Dad picked up along the way. None of the words were sung correctly but we always had so much fun.
Bedtime - Much like campfires without the smoke:)
Dinner - Depending on what we were having for dinner, we listened to Italian, Latin, Indian, you name it! Eating pasta is much more fun while listening to "When the Moon hits your eye like a big Pizza Pie it's Amore . . . "

The list could go on.

My Father doesn't think that he passed on his love of music to us kids! He recently gave me a playlist of "Light Classical" music that I have been playing in the morning for the kids. It is AMAZING the difference that this makes! The tone of our home instantly improves. I love my Dad for sharing with us his gift of music. (He is a composer and musician by trade)

Play music! It adds color to life!

Starting Your Day By Choice

I can think of few things worse than waking up in the morning to crying kids! There is something about being ripped from your sleep to the shrill sounds of discontent coming from the other room. You immediately go into "Mommy" mode. You are barely able to wipe the sleep from your eyes before you are knee deep in diapers. By contrast, you hear the sound of an alarm, you look over and actually CHOOSE to wake up. That's right, you choose to get out of bed and start your day. There is something empowering about it. At this point, I am working out, reading my scriptures, and praying before my kids (and husband) get out of bed. At first, just getting up 15 minutes earlier to take a shower can do wonders! You give your mind a chance to wake up and you feel in control instead of victimized. It will change your whole perspective!!

This . . .


VS. This!

Inevitability

in⋅ev⋅i⋅ta⋅ble:

–adjective
1. unable to be avoided, evaded, or escaped; certain; necessary: an inevitable conclusion.
2. sure to occur, happen, or come; unalterable

"You look like I used to when I needed to study for a big test," James said to me this afternoon. Ha! I remembered it well, the slap happy, fidgety, distract-able, demeanor that he would take on in moments like that. He would do ANYTHING but study; eat, start random conversations, complete odd jobs around the house (even if they were not pressing at all), anything to keep him from hitting the books. He hit the nail right on the head. That is EXACTLY how I am feeling today. ANYTHING but cleaning up this mess . . .really. Do you ever get like that? I have such a mental block about it right now. I just simply do not want to do it. How many times have I stepped over that pillow? looked at those dollies? Stared at that laundry basket? Avoided those shoes? and shamefully, walked past that diaper! Yuck! I don't want to be a housekeeper today. Unfortunately, there is a true principle looming over me and that is the law of inevitability. I will inevitably have to get up off of this chair, inevitably have to unload my dishwasher, inevitably have to put away my laundry, and inevitably have to get on with my chores and responsibilities! Oh reality - how I hate thee!! Your cruelty is immeasurable! Denial is so sweet.

Simple Words

As many of you know, my Adam is a man of few words. He struggles with words; both speaking words and listening to words. I never knew that it could be so difficult to "teach" my child to speak, a process that I took for granted as it naturally happened with my two girls. Adam has been in speech therapy now for a few months. He is making progress, slow and painful progress. Throughout this process, I have come to truly treasure the few words that are spoken by my sweet (sometimes not so sweet) little boy. Last night while I was reading to him and tucking him into bed, he said very simply, "sing." SING. Oh, of course I'll sing! It was a special moment. He was able to articulate a desire and I was able to fulfill his wish. Simple human interaction - profound progress.

Mental Health Days

My Husband was amazing today and gave me a "Mental Health Day." He took the kids to a Birthday party and then went grocery shopping and then took them swimming and to the park. This meant that I was home today from noon until 7:30 p.m. It was so nice to have a little peace and quiet around here. I baked some pumpkin squares with cream cheese frosting, did a little laundry, layed around, and basically just tried to get my bearings again. I don't know whether it is just that it is August in Texas or what but I have been going nutty! I just can't seem to get ahead. After a day to myself I am feeling much better! Thank you honey!
Model Husband +



Yummy Dessert =

Happy Wife!

Reality Check

I'm yawning from my early morning workout! It's going to be a long day! Still worth it!

I'm WAY behind on laundry again! Uggh! I hate this chore!!

Early Morning Workouts!

I know. I know. It is SO hard to get out of bed for these! I have tried so many times to make this one a habit! I have only gone for two days in a row now but I swear this will save you and give you so much more time in your day. Imagine a day where you have exercised and showered before your kids are even out of bed! So invigorating! I even try to squeeze in a little scripture time as well. If you can muster it, it makes all the difference!

Life Saver for you and your toilet bowl!

I picked up some of these and threw them into my toilet tank and didn't really think too much about it. My upstairs toilet doesn't always get flushed as often as it should (Rachel thinks that witches come out of the closet when you flush the toilet). I don't "go" up there very often so this can go unoticed. Since having these in my toilets, they have stayed clean so much longer!! I am definately a fan!

I love chocolate! I hate being fat!

This is a serious problem! I know that many of us suffer from this great dilemma every day of our lives! I have one of the worst sweet tooth's known to man. I tell myself that I am going to go off of sugar and before I know it I am half way finished with a bag of peanut butter M&M's (my personal favorite!). Is there anything worse than a fat day? I can't stand it. If my pants are tight I am instantly in a bad mood. Working out is too hard! There is no instant gratification to be had! I am so discouraged!!!! Whenever my husband tries to simplify things for me, I tell him to try gaining and losing 30 to 40 lbs every other year for the passed eight years and then tell me how he feels. I hate men!! Know it alls! I'm sure you have all heard the saying, "nothing tastes as good as skinny feels." Some things sure get close!

Fresh Air

Lying in the grass in my parents backyard I breath in. The air is cool, thin, and sweet. The sunlight bounces off the leaves in the tree overhead as they sway in the light breeze. It's quiet. The world around me is still. I can't remember the last time I had a moment like this. Thoughts flood my mind, "I need to do this, I can't forget that, I must call____." Stop. Take this in. Relax. It hits me. This is important. Perhaps more important than every other task on my list. Take time to breathe. In and out, in and out, rise and fall. Breathing. It's simple really, takes no thought at all, or does it? There is of course, the air we breathe every day all day long, but a real breath, now that takes some effort. Taking a breath requires being still, quiet, calm, and listening. I must do this more often.

Reality Check

It has been five hours since my last post and I have not vacuumed one thing! Between lunch, speech therapy, nursing, dishes, and laundry, I am exhausted! I am going to have to vacuum tomorrow.

So much to do . . . where do I start? (I think I'll just sit down)

Doesn't she look so Happy??
I'm writing this post primarily for myself. I just went on a week long trip without my kids. It was wonderful but I came home to a house that was without a Mother for six days! There are fingerprints on everything! So, take a deep breath and start with the basics. When I am faced with a messy house I go one room at a time and straighten up. FlyLady suggests that you bring a clothes basket along and place everything that doesn't belong in that room in the basket so that you are not running back and forth from one room to another. Clear the clutter, make beds and Vacuum! Vacuuming is rejuvenating. It makes you feel like things are cleaner than they are. The other reason that I love to vacuum is because in order to vacuum you have to clear the floor. So, I'm off to clear the clutter and vacuum! Have a great day!

One Amazing Woman!

Leah Tanner Cardon

I will never forget my many visits to Granny and Grandad’s house as a child. In the early morning hours, the door would swing open and in would walk Granny carrying grocery bags full of our favorite things: seven –up with vanilla ice cream, “Granny’s specialties” a.k.a. toast with ham and melted cheese, butterscotch candies for hocus pocus, peanuts, and of course all of the fixings for Dad’s favorite fried chicken.
There were evening rides in the back of Grandad’s el camino, and afternoons in the backyard playing on the close line and cinder block fence. I remember the comfort I felt at Granny’s house and the walls and walls of endless memories, all testaments of a life well lived. I can almost see Grandad sitting on the corner square bar stool eating his eggs, sunny-side up, sopping up the yolk with a piece of toast. I can see him in the garden watering the lawn or pulling weeds. They were a perfect team, each such flawless examples to their posterity.
I have often thought of Granny as a young lady. In a time when girls just didn’t do things like go on missions and attend college, she did. At a time when women married young and stayed in the home, she experienced life, then married and still had eight children to boot! With all of the smarts and talents that she possessed she mothered her children. She cultivated their interests and fostered a love for beautiful things, poetry, music, literature, and the arts. She scrimped and saved so that she could provide opportunities to her children that they would never have otherwise had. She thought outside the box, parenting with creativity and cleverness. She was quick witted and saucy, yet respectable, appropriate, and unassuming. Always there to lend a hand, she led a lifetime of service. Never above the most menial tasks, she worked her entire life for the betterment of others.
Somehow, from her modest home in Farmington New Mexico, she managed to inspire her eight children to explore all facets of life; to taste, create, and experience all of what our world has to offer, all of the while, staying true to the thing most precious above all, a testimony of the Savior. What a legacy she leaves behind. In her own quiet way, she has inspired us all. Her name will always mean dignity, selflessness, humility, intelligence, strength, resilience, faith, and endurance. Leah Tanner Cardon. We love you! Love, Niki

Alone Time

It's 1:45 a.m. and I am up waiting for my images to upload to an album that I am making for Brittany's wedding. What am I doing up at this hour you ask? I'm enjoying the silence and I just haven't been able to part with it just yet. Silence and I have been strangers as of late. Now before you get too excited, thinking that I have been relishing in silence for the past four or five hours, think again. I just tucked Rachel back in bed after a bad dream (this happens at least four times a week) and I also just put Claire in her crib. I have really been thinking a lot lately about my role as a Mother. I have all of these high hopes that I will be gentle and kind and nurturing and other such adjectives that we often hear to describe Mothers. Instead I feel irritable, moody, grouchy, bossy, etc. I renew my goal each night to become more "Mothering" only to renew my goal again the next night feeling a little discouraged. The truth is, it just gets too loud around here and my nerves just get a little too sensitive. I want to be patient, I really do, but when it is 5:30 and I am preparing dinner to the sounds of children thudding through the kitchen and squealing at the top of their lungs, laughing hysterically (which is cute but also strangely annoying). I love that they are having a good time and enjoying “their chother” as Audrey would say, but I just can't remember if I put in one cup or two. That is when my blood starts to simmer and then turns into a slow boil. I want to tell the kids to "BE QUIET!" but what do I expect them to do? Sit and fold their arms on the couch - then I would really be worried! I read all of these lovely quotes about not caring about your house and playing with your children, enjoying their childhood, seeing things through their eyes. When you are knee deep in laundry (did I say knee deep? I meant head high) and there is clutter in every corner how do you turn a blind eye??!! I have good intentions. Tonight I was prepared to read stories and play with their hair, sing songs and lull them off to sleep. One whine after another whimper; "I have to go to the bathroom!" "I need a drink." “I’m hot.” “I don’t have any space.” and what happened to my good intentions I ask as I all but slam the door shut on my way out. These are my babies. I love them, each and every one. There is not enough me to go around. So, here I am, at 1:59, alone in my office, relishing in silence, preparing to be a Mother tomorrow

Reality Check

There is elmers glue on the rug and stickers stuck to the desk in my husband's office. Adam was standing on the desk with a bottle of glue (lid off) when I walked in. The surface of the desk is leather.

Reality Check

Claire, my four month old (size 2 diapers) will be wearing Adam's diapers, my 2 1/2 year old (size 5) for the remainder of the day or until I can get to the store without my FOUR children (whichever comes first).

One habit that will save your life!

Fly Lady says that you should wash, fold, and put away all of the laundry in your house every day! Now before you have a complete panic attack, hear me out. As I am typing this I probably have two loads of laundry to fold, one in the washer, one in the dryer, and three or four loads (if you count the comforter that needs washed) left to put in. AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!
That my friends, is the result of NOT taking flylady's advise. It takes a lot of hard work upfront to begin doing laundry this way. It requires that you get all the way caught up and then you can start the maintenance process.
In order for me to stay on top of it I have to do two loads of laundry a day (clean, folded and put away). This way, I only do two small loads a day and it takes me way less time and energy! It is much easier to fold two small loads of laundry than it is to do my eight loads that I have to look forward to today!
One laundry day a week is impossible! A wise woman once gave me a helpful tip. She said to fold your laundry immediately when it comes out of the dryer and then put it away if time permits. That way you do not get in the habit of letting it sit in piles and it doesn't have time to get wrinkled.
Remember, if it is only one of two small loads, it will only take you five minutes! So much easier! Now, I'm off to play catch-up! I hope I can get back to this more efficient process soon.

Doesn't it take just as much work or more??

My friend Eden read the last post and asked this question in regards to teaching your children to help. The answer is yes and no. I have always thought the very same thing. I can't stand it when I am stressed out and trying to clean or cook and the little people get involved! It is hard to manage their little hands and their clumsy efforts in a stressful situation. To avoid this, you have to plan ahead. You have to change your mentality. You are training them, not just getting the work, done. What surprised me was that as soon as the kids got involved they were also entertained. Keeping the kids busy while I tried to do housework was always my greatest challenge. This way, they are busy helping and it really takes no extra effort. They come to me and ask, "what else can I do Mom?" I may have to go back and finish their jobs here or there but it is still easier than doing the whole thing myself. My greatest fear is to be the type of martyr Mom who has to do EVERYTHING for her teenage children! It is our responsibility as parents to TEACH our children how to function as adults. I can't tell you how many times I hear my friends talking about how they do not know how to cook! I have been making one of my girls my dinner helper and the other my dish helper. The dinner helper gets to help me cook meals that week. It may only be a couple of meals but every little bit helps. One night, we had breakfast for dinner when we were running low on groceries. Rachel was my helper. She stirred the eggs in the pan while I watched. She then made all of the toast and buttered each slice! She felt so proud of herself! There are so many little things that the kids can do to help cook. The key is to start with a clean surface and as little outside noise as possible. That means putting on a movie for the younger kids or setting up a game in the other room. Trust me. Teaching the kids to help is easier in the long run and is an absolute must for your children's future!

Reality Check

I totally forgot that I invited people over for dinner and was kindly reminded when they showed up at my door! Can you say improvise???

Rally the Troops!

A new day has arrived at the carter home! I am no longer alone! I now have a little army of cleaners at my disposal if I will only take the time to train them. The days of cleaning my whole house by myself from top to bottom while my kids watch TV are over. Now we blast music throughout the house and everyone gets a job. The kids actually really enjoy helping! I have been amazed at what the kids are able to do!

Rachel helped with drying and putting away dishes. Age 5

Rachel and Adam were given windex wipes to clean the windows and mirrors. (Windex wipes work much better for kids because they can't spray the whole bottle of windex on one window!)
Adam, Age 2
Audrey vacuumed the stairs! Hallelujah (I hate vacuuming stairs). She also vacuumed the other rooms in the house. age 7
I have really had to change my attitude about teaching the kids to help. I have learned some great lessons in the book that I am reading "The parenting Breakthrough." by Merrilee Browne Boyak. She says "parents who nurture too much convey messages like this to your children: You can't do this because - You are not smart enough.
You're not reliable enough.
You're not old enough.
You're not responsible enough.
You're just a child.
I don't trust you.
I don't believe in you.
You're not capable of taking care of yourself.
The quality of your work is inadequate.
Moms do all the work.

On the flip side she says:

"The best self-esteem for children comes from being able to do things on their own."

"In the final analysis it is not what you do for your children but what you have taught them to do for themselves that will make them successful human beings." Ann Landers

So, teaching my kids to do work builds self confidence! When put into action I was amazed at how the mood in my home changed. Instead of feeling like I was alone cleaning in circles while the kids destroyed things behind me, I felt like we were on a team, having fun and working together. We work hard together before noon and then we can do something fun for the rest of the day!


A list of age appropriate tasks to follow next post!

Hey Ladies!

I'm so excited about this blog! Every time I have ever posted anything about Motherhood on my own personal blog I have had an overwhelming response. The truth is, we can all use all the help we can get! Throughout my own personal journey of becoming a Mother (and by becoming a Mother I don't mean simply giving birth to a child), I have stumbled upon some really helpful resources. I want to share them with you! I want this to be a place where we can all discuss parenting issues, home organization strategies, emotional health and wellness, physical health, and the like. There is so much involved in being a woman! We are complicated creatures! Ready . . . set . . . go!



The first thing I want to share with you is a poem. It goes a little something like this . . .


I am your constant companion.
I am your greatest helper or heaviest burden.
I will push you onward or drag you down to failure.
I am completely at your command.
Half of the things you do you might as well turn over to me and I
will do them - quickly and correctly.
I am easily managed - you must be firm with me.
Show me exactly how you want something done and after a few
lessons, I will do it automatically.
I am the servant of great people,
and alas, of all failures as well.
Those who are great, I have made great.
Those who are failures, I have made failures.
I am not a machine though
I work with the precision of a machine
plus the intelligence of a person.
You may run me for profit or run me for ruin -
it makes no difference to me.
Take me, train me, be firm with me, and
I will place the world at your feet.
Be easy with me and I will destroy you. Who am I?
I am Habit.
(Anonymous)


Wouldn't you love to have something done automatically and without thought? I would. Lets create some good habits!



According to the experts who study human behavior, it takes only twenty-one days of doing something consistently to form a habit. In other words, it can be just three weeks to a better me! Poor habits can be exchanged for good ones or a new one can be cultivated in three short weeks. Good habits are liberating.
It’s worth it to create good habits in your home management. The returns will be good habits for the entire family, allocating much of the daily doings to the automatic pilot of habit, thus freeing you up to build relationships and enjoy creative pursuits.


©2009 Daryl V. Hoole


Start small!

Tomorrow morning when you wake up, make your bed immediately.

Then, open all of your blinds and let the morning sunshine in! (No! Not sunshine when I'm all groggy! (My point exactly!))

Next, start a load of laundry (or restart the one that you left in there yesterday).





Then unload your dishwasher (or load it and run it from last nights dinner) while your kiddos eat breakfast and watch cartoons.










Ahhh, doesn't that feel better! By now you should be feeling energized and optimistic!