Fasten your seatbelts . . .

. . . it's gonna be a bumpy ride! My kids have decided to grow up!! You are not going to believe the conversation I had with my almost eight year old tonight. It went a little something like this . . .

Audrey:

"How come I can't have a cell phone?! ALL of my friends have a cell phone!" (Oh the injustice!)

Mom: (Me)

"Audrey, I am sure that ALL of your friends do not have a cell phone."

Audrey:

"I feel left out! I hardly have any electronics." (Did she just say electronics?)

"My friends can get whatever they want and you don't let me do anything. I feel like a baby!"

Mom:

"Well you are just going to have to get used to it!" "There are going to be many times in your life that other people are going to have things that you don't have. You have SO MUCH MORE that most children do. You need to be grateful for what you have."

Rewind to a couple of days ago . . .

Slam door and cue stomping and huffing.

Audrey:

"I feel embarrassed in front of my friends! My friend said, "You can't ride bikes out of the cul-de-sac!!?? I can go anywhere I want to." I feel like you treat me like a baby! Why can't I go outside the cul-de-sac!

Mom:

"I can't see you when you go outside the cul-de-sac and I don't want you to get hurt."

Audrey:

"I'm not going to get hurt!"

Mom:

"What if someone took you?"

Audrey:

"People in this neighborhood are nice, no one is going to take me!"

Mom: (What do I do here???)

"I'll tell you what, I will let you go around the corner to the stop sign and then you have to turn back around."

Audrey:

Out the door, new found freedom to be abused!

Split screen to Rachel . . .

Already outside doing everything that Audrey has at least bothered to talk to me about. Blissfully doing whatever she wants and not even taking a moment to consider whether or not it is allowed.

Cue Adam

"I want to play in the sprinkler!" (In broken English)

Mom: "Go ask your sisters to play with you."

Beep Beep Beep (door alarms)

Mom: (I'm sure he will come in when he realizes he can't turn it on by himself)

Five minutes later . . .

No Adam!!! All over the house, in the car and everywhere outside - NO ADAM!

Mom: (Panic!) He has never done this before.

10 minutes later . . .

Scan to nice lady walking hand in hand toward the cul-de-sac with half naked three year old boy.

Mom: Embarrassed, excuses, hugs, Thank you's!

Do I have a target on my forehead?? HELP!!!!!